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Toot toot (sh.itjust.works)
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[-] EarthShipTechIntern@lemm.ee 5 points 4 months ago

Better out than in, as our holy green swamp ogre says

[-] zanyllama52@infosec.pub 5 points 4 months ago

Well, I would love it if my tightly wound boss would pull something like this. Way out of character.

As a college student, I walked into the multi-use bathroom, and proceeded to a urinal. Strange, rhythmic, wet sounds were coming from the lone stall in use. I thought, "Okay, what the hell is this?" and tried to wrap things up quick, in case things got weird. Too late. I then hear another strange sound from the stall, something like crinkling wax paper. None of this made sense to my young mind. Then I hear a wet "plop" from the stall, and more crinkling wax paper noises. I quickly finish up, and turn to leave. On the floor of the stall I can see a partially eaten Subway sandwich. Unbelievable

This base human then picks up the sandwich, and continues eating.

To this day, I do not eat Subway.

[-] Lauchmelder@feddit.org 4 points 4 months ago
[-] Okokimup@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago
[-] MightyCuriosity@sh.itjust.works 2 points 4 months ago

I'm a sheep

[-] Wilzax@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago
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[-] Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 4 months ago

I'd honestly ask them if they'd seen a doctor about that. No one should be that gassy on a regular basis.

[-] Unbecredible@lemm.ee 4 points 4 months ago

All I do is fart. Except during the times when I'm holding in my farts so I can keep living among society. But even then I'm just quietly belching under my breath. All I am is gas. Held together in the loose shape of a man by the surface tension in a bubble of cheeseburger grease and the force of my will to eat another. Just one more. My urine is carbonated.

.

[-] NikkiDimes@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago

Are you me? I gas my poor boyfriend every day. I've just come to accept it at this point.

[-] Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 4 months ago

Have you seen a doctor about that? No one should be that gassy on a regular basis.

[-] Schlemmy@lemmy.ml 1 points 4 months ago

Liquid ass. That's the solution.

[-] AidsKitty@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

Keep your distance?

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this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2024
1234 points (99.3% liked)

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