Wooden plaque that had the words "I swear it was clean yesterday." From my dad.
I'm not one for impractical clutter. And my dad could be very judgemental. Why I would want an ugly handmade plaque that would imply I was messy, lazy, and dishonest about it?
My gran once gave me a toilet brush. The base had penguins floating in blue liquid, but it was ultimately just a cheap toilet brush.
I gave her a beautiful marble maze.
I didn’t bother after that.
Older brother wrapped up his old dirty shoes for me for Christmas.
He thought it was hilarious.
Not the gift itself, but the response.
First of all, even before Christmas I said I'd prefer NO GIFTS at all. Regardless, my dad got me some inkjet HP printer. I thanked him for it, but asked him that we'd return it. I tried to be respectful, but regardless, he got mad at me and didn't talk with me for like 2 days.
Later he sent me the money for it and asked me to buy something for it and show him what it was. I do not know why I couldn't just keep it as extra money, but oh well, it had to be spent on something.
I got a refurbished ThinkPad for that. Pretty good device, by far beating value of HP inkjet. I even got it with a 2 year warranty (without extended) like with a new device, while only 1 year is required.
My mom knows I'm always buying tools for work (electrician) and computer-related parts/devices. She still has trouble wrapping around the idea that I don't want (as much as I sincerely do appreciate the gesture) anything in those arenas due to specificity of requirement, that and most things of that nature tend to be expensive. She still buys little random things from Home Depot, like last year she bought this wrist cuff thing with magnets on it. Great idea on paper, but not in the field. At this point she's getting older so I kinda just humor her.
A tri-fold wallet. It was a good wallet, and I appreciated the gesture. It's just that I HATE tri-fold wallets.
The gift of world peace. It was granted to me in lieu of the PS2 I wanted by my fairy godmother. Needless to say I held my breath until she finally relented, and took it back. She gave me a PS2 and I close the curtains and put on headphones a lot when I'm at home.
Store bought pudding, no clue what I was supposed to do with that.
Eat. That's what you usually do with pudding. /j
So I’m a trans guy and as a kid I was very obviously masculine, stereotypical tomboy. One of my aunts that married into the family gave me, maybe around age 5-7, a toy makeup kit. To this day I don’t know wtf she was thinking, because it wasn’t like she never met or saw me. Was it thoughtless or passive aggressive? Who can say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Top three would be my weird Christmas 'bonuses' from a previous employer. In order of weirdness: some fake notes (representing the companies record profits that year), a single bike pedal, and finally a spanner which had been spray painted orange.
My sister wanted me to be the Godfather to her children. She considered it a "gift."
I'm an atheist. I told her explicitly "Hey, you remember I'm an atheist, right?" Part of this whole Godfather business is making a promise to raise them religiously if their parent dies. I thought I was being considerate and kind by being honest that I did not want to be a Godfather because I could not in good conscience make such a promise.
Nope, I'm the bad guy, not the person who knew I was atheist and decided to not respect that at all anyway by asking me to be a Godfather to begin with.
Was that their expectation of you, or just a common religious interpretation?
I know plenty of people who use the term and have no care for the religious history of it.
Even that aside, what kind of gift is "You'll have to take care of my kids if I die."?
One of those fake electric smores fireplaces…. I have a real hearth
My Dad once gifted me a bazinga shirt. I don't watch the big bang theory.
A broken propeller toy wrapped in a ripped up plastic grocery bag.
A goddamned bible. What the fuck am I going to do with that?
Just leave it in a random hotel room drawer—seems to be where most of them end up eventually. /s
Years ago my father in law gave me a Costco sized flat of Nanaimo bars. Like just wrapped it and that was that. I was so bummed as I thought it was a big coffee table book. I ended up cutting them all in half and freezing them, so we had treats through the year. My husband and I still joke about it. As we passed them in Costco last week he suggested I return the favour.
Motivational calendar...
Thanks mom
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