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this post was submitted on 06 Mar 2024
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Privacy
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Poor impulse control is a hallmark symptom. It could very well be viewed that my decision to reply was a lack of impulse control. Especially because, intellectually I understand that I didn’t need to respond at all and that I was adding negative energy where there wasn’t any… generally not a nice thing to do. Looking back on it, I see that.
I’m not sure that I agree that “owning my mistake” is a solution here.
It’s also worth noting that blaming me for worsening a stigma against ADHD is kinda triggering. It makes me feel shitty, without any clear path to improving. Unless I misunderstand what it means to own your mistakes. I generally understand that to mean “I fucking suck, I see that and I will endeavor to do better”.
Idk…
I aoologize, I should have realized it would feel like I was piling on and that wasn't really my intent.
I'm not saying it aint the ADHD. Not to be presumptuous, but I suspect from the sound of it I am probably a lot like you in some ways. I'm just saying you dont need to bring up ADHD at all. Just accept that you fucked up, apologize, and move on. And that's what I meant by "own your mistake." I felt like bringing up ADHD is still deflecting unnecessarily. It doesn't mean you are a shitty person, it just means you were rude once on the internet.
That's a very mature way to view it. I respect that.
I dont think that is a healthy way to view having made a mistake, especially one so minor. Not that I generally manage to avoid the same trap. I think the mindful approach to guilt or remorse would be to observe and judge the actions, but not to judge ourselves. With this, give yourself some grace. You're probably your own worst critic.
I've always viewed apologies as best summed up by this sentiment. Almost every time I cause hurt or harm, it is unintentional. Unfortunately, that is rarely an excuse. The best I can do is try to make up for it and try not to make the same mistake, in the same way, again.