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this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2024
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politics
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The fuck you talking about? We have lots of jokes:
Orange man bad (because, and I can't believe I have to explain this, fascists are bad)
Two scoops
Mr. 6'3" is somehow shorter than 6'1" Obama
Billions and billions and billions and billions and...
Tiny hands
Accordion hands
The only two adjectives are "beautiful" and "perfect"
hamberders
covfefe
Drawer full of "medication"
Salutes North Korean generals
Lived in a gaudy gold-plated New York penthouse and shat in a gold-plated toilet, but is totally a man of the people and not one of the "elite"
Went bankrupt selling steaks to Americans
Went bankrupt selling alcohol to Americans
Went bankrupt selling gambling to Americans
Twice-divorced, thrice-married, slept-with-pornstars-and-paid-them-to-keep-quiet "man of God."
2 Corinthians
The army "rammed the ramparts" and "took over the airports" in 1775
"Dumbest goddamn student I ever had."
Won't wear masks because it would smear his makeup. (Oh wait, there's that one joke again. Silly me!)
But I guess you are right about all of that being one joke- that Donald Trump was ever or will ever be fit to be President.
You forgot diaper.
And staring at the sun.
Iirc that wasn't just staring at the sun, that was staring at the sun during an eclipse.
Every time I think about that, I say to myself "Yup. That's the US President there."
Cue the "I'm proud to be an American...." song when you think about it.
Oh Jesus fuck, how did I forget that one?
I had "Diaper Don" on my list, but I guess I just forgot it.
Bing bing, bong bong bong, bing bing! Your deep state software hasn't been updated to the latest memes!
The most recent one is "Don Poorleone" after the whole bond debacle.
Oh I thought it was "deadbeat don"
I'm not updating my list until my next Sorosbux check clears. The last one took too long to arrive.
Republicans don't have the empathy or self-reflection to have a sense of humor.
Do you remember that photo of his shitty combover being blown backwards where you could see the border between his skin and his clown makeup? It was circulating with some text like, "after you use Tupperware for spaghetti one time."
I'm clapping and crying and shitting rn
I don't think I know the two scoops one.
White he was occupying the White House (you know, the 75% of the time he wasn't golfing) Trump would take two scoops of ice cream and make sure everyone else got just one scoop.
Hence the name "Donny Two-Scoops." Bonus point, that's also why Jr is named "Half-Scoop."