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submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by Subject6051@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

I am low on money these days and my life is hell for it. I have to do with substandard everything in my life I recently had an incident where an elderly woman asked me for money while roaming the street with her family begging for money. I had no money to spare, but had I had any, I wouldn't have given a penny to her (Life is tough, I can't give away money I didn't earn)

But, she later said something which melted my heart, "Majboori hai beta!" (Hindi) "We don't want to do this, but we have to do it son" (now add some emotional value to it), I didn't know what to do, I was on my cycle and I could feel their eyes on me as I passed them and I just peddled faster with teary eyes.

I didn't know how to deal with that. i.e., I don't have enough money for medical necessities or to improve the standard of living of my own life, but I was being asked to spare change by a poor family that was demonstrably in a worse spot than me.

I was always taught that if you give beggars money, they will spend it all on alcohol (not blaming them), and given the number of beggars who have come to be smelling like alcohol and death with wobbly balance, it has been a rule not to provide them with money. Also, let's not forget, if you're really poor (homeless and have nothing to lose) and you are really desperate, you are often dangerous i.e., not someone around whom your kids can roam, again, not blaming them. But... I don't know what is right or wrong in this situation!

How do you deal with external problems you can't solve around you? What is the moral thing to do here?

edit: This kinda reminds of a story about Jesus where a prince once came to him and told him that he isn't at peace with himself no matter what he does, and Jesus told him that to get peace he must give away everything to the poor and follow Jesus around and the prince refused (something along those lines).

I know what the most moral thing might be in this case, but even if you tell me that I should give money to those who live in abject poverty, I probably won't do it as often as I should.

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[-] ClassifiedPancake@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I believe everyone will just take advantage of my generosity and so I don’t even bother helping anyone.

[-] TheButtonJustSpins@infosec.pub 6 points 5 months ago

If someone tricks you out of $20 by saying they need it, that says bad things about their character but good things about yours.

[-] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 5 points 5 months ago

Genuinely wondering, what does that even mean? How do you think a person who is homeless or poor would "take advantage" of $5 or food you give them?

[-] Subject6051@lemmy.ml 2 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

It adds up. Especially if you are in a populated city.

I am not saying most homeless people dupe you into giving them money which they later use for exotic stuff, but many do. I really am not blaming them, maybe drugs are the only relief they have in their lives, I don't know, but I can't refute the argument that that money would do more damage than good.

[-] ClassifiedPancake@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

In Germany a lot of „homeless“ people are part of some group of scammers and they might even pickpocket you or follow you around.

[-] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 3 points 5 months ago

Fair enough and thanks for answering. I know that can happen sometimes but, honestly, most people are just struggling. They're not all out to get you.

[-] ClassifiedPancake@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Problem is you can’t know and that’s why I’m afraid.

But I’m generally not very trustful, so it’s not just homeless people.

[-] Subject6051@lemmy.ml 1 points 5 months ago

But I’m generally not very trustful

Does it say anything about the German culture or is it just you?

I guess it’s also very German

this post was submitted on 12 Jul 2024
102 points (98.1% liked)

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