I agree with your overall conclusion, but not with your theory. Yes men and women have more equality in education and professional settings. However, women have changed the social and romantic spheres through feminism SIGNIFICANTLY. The household division of labor and the power dynamics in a relationship are two pretty big examples of change. Yes, women haven't changed the systems that benefit them. I don't think that's out of a desire to "maintain a benefit". I think it's because it is hard to see a system that doesn't hurt you, or one that benefits you. That's the whole concept of privilege: the benefits are invisible to those that benefit. These aspects of patriarchy hurt men, and it is therefore men who must demand and create change, to take down the patriarchal systems that hurt us.

We just never noticed because before because on the whole cis straight white men benefited and everyone else suffered. Now that everyone is taking apart all the systems that hurt them (often to our benefit), all that's left are the parts that hurt us (sometimes to the benefit of others). We just need to keep taking the patriarchy apart!