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I never realized this
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this post was submitted on 01 Jan 2025
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Unpopular opinion: Last names are inherently patriarchal and so is marriage
On Spain we have two last names, one for the father other for the mother.
And while before the father's was always the first, since many years couples of newborn babies can choose the order of the surnames.
Is the latter your mother's first or second last name?
First last name. Example:
Mother: Maria García Perez
Father: Juan Rodríguez Domínguez
Their kids can be named:
Adela García Rodríguez
or
Adela Rodríguez García
Ans once selected the order with the first kid all the kids from the same couple must follow the same order.
So it's the mother's father's name, or the names of both grandfathers. Still patrilineal
I mean, if you go that way, when surnames where created in the middle ages it was the name of the man.
All spanish surnames ending in -ez mean "son of". And it's always male names.
But change has to start at some point.
Some cultures trace heritage both patrilineal and matrilineal, so taking the first last name of your father as your first and the second last name of your mother as your second would be that.
I'm curious, which country does it like that? Seems pretty interesting.
I read it in Everyday Utopia. A totally worthwhile book that includes discussions about alternatives to the nuclear family we are so accustomed to. I didn't find this exact example but in general, hunter gatherers have a much broader sense of heritage and family than we have. That's why it's so stupid when people claim they only care about their own family. Well, if you meet someone whose mother's father had the same totem animal as one of your caregiving adults who joined your group late in life, you might not share a language with this someone, but you are family. And once you live long enough in a group, you become family anyway.
Yeah I've always thought it was weird that women are supposed to give up their identity to a man to be married. I'm not really sure why hyphenated names aren't as popular in the western world or why people don't occasionally chose to take the woman's name. I know that women don't have to change their names, but then often you'll have the kids as the same name as the father anyway but not the mother. So I've heard many women say that they did it so their kids would share their last name.
Hell, I don't even like my father. But my name is who I am and I like it.
with hyphenated names: what would the children do then? you can't keep adding more and more names like that (both practically and legally in some cases). serious question because I've also thought about that
I think it varies with culture, but from my understanding, usually they take the first name of the two hyphens for their own marriage.
So you have John Doe and Jane Smith. They hyphenate their names as Doe-Smith and the children do as well.
Say they have a daughter Sally Doe-Smith who meets Tim Johnson-Star. So they marry and hyphenate their names as Johnson-Doe. Both Smith and Star get dropped.
Yes, in examples like this, it still ends up as getting rid of the maternal aspect of the lineage in the very end...but the point is still that both parties are keeping part of and changing another part of their names. It's not an all or nothing total switch of identity. The lineage is male, but the here and now is an equal compromise of identity.
You clearly haven't met Brazilians
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Name_blending
In Canada, you legally pick up to 2 of your parents' last names for your last name
In ~~Soviet~~ Russia you pick a last name. Any last name. Except containing numbers, non-letters, more than one hyphen, rank or job title.
My name is Maximus Decimus Arnold Garfield Butcher Smith Hendrickson Meridius, and you shall have my name.
The way that I'm gonna do it is whoever has the coolest/most unique last name is the one whose name is adopted. If they're both equally cool, then hyphenated it is.
Hyphenated names are too long. One of my good friends has one and people just refer to him and his siblings by the initials of their last name, like "Tim MP"
How do hyphenated names work after the next generation? Seems like that would get out of hand quickly when people with hyphenated last names start having kids with each other.
Why would that be the case? How would marriage between two equals in a non-patriarchy be patriarchal? What about marriage between two women? What about last names in a society of beings without gender?
I think you didnt mean 'inherently'
is that an unpopular opinion, or just a well-known fact?