131
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] kadu@lemmy.world 111 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

In about 5 minutes I get a complaint her storage is full.

I have unspeakable amounts of pictures of my cats saved. No, I will not delete the ones that are nearly identical.

[-] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 96 points 1 year ago

Nothing? She already has access to it all anyway...

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] BananaPeal@sh.itjust.works 84 points 1 year ago

I'd start by wondering how in the hell I got a girlfriend, then my wife would do the same.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] Dirk@lemmy.ml 83 points 1 year ago

Dunno, but I have a girlfriend now.

[-] treadful@lemmy.zip 38 points 1 year ago
[-] Dirk@lemmy.ml 31 points 1 year ago

Thanks, bro! But she has all my files now.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] empireOfLove@lemmy.one 74 points 1 year ago

It'll take her so long to scroll through all the movies and TV episodes that she'll never get far enough down the file tree to find the niche porn.

[-] briongloid@aussie.zone 31 points 1 year ago
[-] empireOfLove@lemmy.one 44 points 1 year ago

NOT illegal, and not crazy shocking weird. But niche enough that when I find content I like, I do try to download it because finding it again on the typical streaming sources can sometimes be a crapshoot.

[-] original_ish_name@lemm.ee 13 points 1 year ago

What if she uses a file search?

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] fakeman_pretendname@feddit.uk 48 points 1 year ago

She would be disappointed in how untidy my files are.

"Why is the final version of this project called "test1_b_new_reworked_draft_2_prefinal_dif_font_b_temp_FINAL.png"?

She would then forgive me because her filing is worse than mine.

[-] original_ish_name@lemm.ee 27 points 1 year ago

Use git.

Please.

I'm begging you.

load more comments (15 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[-] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 47 points 1 year ago

If I had a girlfriend, then several gigabytes of my files would be largely useless

[-] twotone@lemmy.world 42 points 1 year ago

Ha, look at this loser, only has "several gigabytes" of 'Linux ISOs'

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 46 points 1 year ago

I'd then be asking myself when and why I got a girlfriend.

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] squaresinger@feddit.de 45 points 1 year ago

Apparently, OP is the only one who's got something to hide from his girlfriend.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] miss_brainfart@lemmy.ml 37 points 1 year ago

If she's my girlfriend, she's not going to judge, and instead lend me some of her clothes, help me with makeup, and discover that she's not 100% straight after all

[-] sudo22@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago

Not sure how the girlfriend world react. But my wife would be pissed that I now have one.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] TheButtonJustSpins@infosec.pub 35 points 1 year ago

My wife gets mad that I have a girlfriend.

I become very confused at finding out that I have a girlfriend.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] peter@feddit.uk 29 points 1 year ago

My files are already unencrypted and she has the password to my pc. We're both adults so she obviously knows that I watch porn so they wouldn't surprise her. Everything else is just boring stuff.

load more comments (10 replies)
[-] Mothra@mander.xyz 27 points 1 year ago

She'll get bored as going through those files. Meanwhile I'll be trying to figure out if her sudden presence in my life means I'm now bi or homosexual

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] Dr_Cog@mander.xyz 27 points 1 year ago

Wife already has access to my computer and all my files.

Do people not stream their porn nowadays?

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] TheObserver@lemmy.dbzer0.com 27 points 1 year ago

Well I'm a datahoarding pirate so lots of movies, shows, games, porn, hacking tools, bot creation tools, firmwares, family pics, movie/show posters, ISOs, etc. Nothing to hide really. Might question my complete siterip of cum4k, tiny4k, and anal4k maybe.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] init@lemmy.ml 25 points 1 year ago

My wife would probably divorce me for having a girlfriend I didn't know about

[-] Wahots@pawb.social 25 points 1 year ago

My bf wouldn't care, lol. It's mostly boring. And the spicy stuff is already stuff he's seen.

[-] Krachsterben@feddit.de 35 points 1 year ago

Same.

Btw it's so lame that OP assumes it's only guys here. There's dozens of us!!!

[-] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago

Women can have girlfriends, too!

I think the better wording for the title would be "partner" rather than girlfriend 👍

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] pH3ra@lemmy.ml 24 points 1 year ago

"Wow, so many unfinished projects"

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] Steeve@lemmy.ca 22 points 1 year ago

What kind of question is this? OP you're sketchy af

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] Anomalocarididae@pawb.social 21 points 1 year ago

I rejoice at having a girlfriend

[-] jet@hackertalks.com 20 points 1 year ago

She immediately comes to me for tech support and asks what to do with this data, how to access it, etc..

You over estimate the technical independence of people near a geek. It's like they gleefully turn their brains off.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 19 points 1 year ago

What happens? Well, I just got a girlfriend!

About the files, I don't even remember what's in there.
So much random stuff.
90 random PDFs some of which is books I planned and still plan to read, but firstly I need to somehow gain some understanding in mathematics
Files recovered from 128MB MicroSD card I found on sidewalk some years back
Files recovered from my tablet I had when I was 8
Files recovered from mom's old phone
Copies of DVDs I own as .iso files
1,118 songs I've been collecting since I was 8
54 "Educational videos" - Electronics plus GSM cracking series
Leaked source code of FarCry because why not
212 pictures of Hatsune Miku
Never Gonna Give You Up video
1,739 Screenshots
22 Firefox buttons and banners
140 satellite images received with my SDR
1,553 Photos (Camera)
3 websites downloaded with wget

And 10s of thousands of insignificant files I don't even remember. But that's just my phone's SD Card. I don't delete stuff, at most I move it to directory named ZZZ_Garbage.

[-] Slice@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

Living this right now, but it's great. She's organizing my entire plex server!

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] dbx12@programming.dev 18 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I finally made a full backup of my system. I guess be happy about that.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] bignuts700@pawb.social 17 points 1 year ago

~8tb of movies and tv shows all 100% legal 🥰

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] coffee@lemm.ee 16 points 1 year ago

Nothing. She has a login on my system and can access pretty much anything already, minus emails and dropbox I believe. But there's nothing worth hiding either.

[-] Saigonauticon@voltage.vn 16 points 1 year ago

Neat, free backups! Thanks!

[-] AphoticDev@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 1 year ago

She gets bored looking at it all, probably. The most interesting thing I there is nudes of her.

Ok, she would get a little annoyed with all the pictures of her sleeping. She hates me taking photos of her asleep.

[-] Fizz@lemmy.nz 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Probably just ask why I have so many pictures saved of other people's cats.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] AssPennies@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

My wife flips her fucking lid.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 year ago

None of my shit is encrypted because none of my shit is interesting enough to warrant it

🤷

[-] bookmeat@lemm.ee 13 points 1 year ago

I get nervous about her discovering I'm married to someone else.

[-] megane_kun@lemm.ee 13 points 1 year ago

My SO‌ already has my files, encrypted or not, on their NAS (part of an arrangement where I keep my backup on their NAS, and they'd keep their backup on my NAS--once I manage to have one). I doubt they even gave it a look.

load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 28 Aug 2023
131 points (82.6% liked)

Asklemmy

44173 readers
2407 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS