There is a great way to monitor employee’s performance. This one weird trick will save you losing your best employees!

Are their tasks getting done on time and with quality work?

Congrats! You just learned how to treat your employees like adults.

Now kindly fuck off and let me continue to work in my underwear.

Actually it's simple. Work well done? Cool, the employee is working. This "monitoring" mentality needs to fucking die.

"In probably unrelated news, remote workers love how they can't be micromanaged or watched over their shoulders and are frustrated and disoriented by return-to-office plans."

I’ve been working remotely for almost a decade now and have been a manager for 6 of those years and I do the following:

Is [EMPLOYEE]’s work getting done? If yes then do nothing aside from thanking them. If no then talk to employee and/or start the corrective action process.

I have neither the need nor the desire to hover over them. They’re grown ass adults.

So don’t. Give your employees tasks and then leave them the hell alone. If they don’t get things done, find a new employee.

As a boss who thinks remote work is fucking amazing, these people are retarded.

Skill issue.

It’s almost as if most middle management is completely unnecessary and a massive drain on resources if they feel that most of their time should be spent monitoring their employees.

They are too stupid to actually review your work. No, they need to SEE you doing your work.

"Bosses" can go fuck themselves, alongside the astroturfing scum that keeps pumping out articles trying to validate the idiotic decision of returning to offices.

You can monitor the work being done. Is the work being done? That's all you need to know.

I think the biggest problem is that employers used to require that we do all the work we can do. The easiest way to achieve that is to observe that no one is slacking off. With Home Office there is suddenly a need to find out what is a reasonable workload. They seem to fear that they don't get occupy the employees 100% of the time and as usual on capitalism it is not enough when you produce enough bit when you produce all you can.

It's actually not that hard. If the assigned tasks are being fulfilled within set parameters there's really nothing to observe and keep track of. What they're worried about and what they can't monitor and observe is what the employees are doing outside of those tasks.

My friend works from home he does all his work and in the down time he'll run errands, work out, and play pool at his local bar. Whatever. His work is fully completed and submitted and his performance views are top notch.

And that's pretty much the only thing employers need to be worried about. How well the work is being completed.

Fuck the office.

They're frustrated because it shows that they aren't necessary. People can just get on and do their work without some micromanager breathing down their neck.

Micromanagers HATE this one trick.

FFS, if you cannot monitor your employee's productivity via ERP software or meetings you are a shit boss and you should have been shitcanned a long time ago. Why the fuck is the mainstream media pumping out this shit day in and day out?

I hate remote work because it means I have to pay attention to overall output and the progress of the project instead of constantly surveilling and lording my authority over the workers, who I view as subhuman tools for my own enrichment.

Does that about sum it up?

Simple solution. Is the work getting done? Then your minions, sorry employees, are doing their jobs.

Is the work being finished and timelines being met? Congratulations, you know all you need to know.

That’s a feature not a bug. Enjoy the increased productivity and the less having to be on top of things that don’t matter.

Most industries should do remote work as much as possible, specifically the ones that involves sitting in front of a computer all day: less traffic on the road, no commute time, more commercial office real estate that can be converted to housing/shops...

I don't really see the downside to any of this except to micro-managers.

Because they’re fucking morons that don’t deserve to hold the reigns

Lol, get fucked. I’d sacrifice 50% of my pay before going back to the office full time.

And THAT is the real purpose behind RTO; these pathetic losers feel like they’ve lost grip on those they perceive below them

They desperately need to feel in control. (Also they want to introduce things like second-by-second AI monitoring of each employee, this is already a reality; ever heard of WADU? Sounds bad but not that bad right? wrong)

Here’s some relevant snippets

I think everyone expects their employer to track them to some extent. It is pretty standard practice for employers to monitor and run analysis on things like building badge swipes and the amount of time spent connected when working from home. It has also become very common place for employers to record audio and video at the office. WADU is on a different level. It is an artificial intelligence & machine learning system for workforce human behavior. Starting at the moment you arrive to the building, WADU is tracking you using facial and speech recognition. Most JPMC offices and branches have been outfitted with some of the best HD AV security cameras. Whenever you are at your desk, know that there is a HD camera tracking you the entire time. WADU uses the array of HD cameras at the office to monitor all of your non-verbal body language all throughout the day. The collected information is then fed into the AI/ML system and it is used to update your WADU profile in real time. Every manager gets access to a dashboard that lists all the metrics about their subordinates. The productivity metrics about an employee start getting updated immediately after an employee logs into the system. If the employee is at the office, two bio-metrics are available, attention/focus and stress. The bio-metric feeds are updated from the facial and behavioral tracking. Having a bad day? Stressed about something? WADU has already noticed this and alerted your manager. Can’t focus? Not working at your usual pace? WADU has already noticed this and alerted your manager. Did something you normally don’t do? It’s possible WADU flagged it as suspicious and alerted your manager. WADU is also why they are pushing RTO or “return to office” so hard. Upper management does not care if some employees are more productive when they are working from home. They want everyone back in the office as much as possible so that their WADU profiles are being refined. Enhancing their insight into you is more important to them than better productivity from working from home. A lot of teams are now required to come in two to three days per week. Director level and higher are required to come in four to five days per week. Upper management wants to see everyone at all levels back in the office five days a week. They have invested millions into the WADU system, and they want to get a return on that investment. That only happens whenever people are in the office as much as possible.

Guess what...FUCK BOSSES.

I'm a call center manager. I don't really observe or control my team. I just look at their results.

Tell me you're an incompetent manager without telling me you're an incompetent manager.

Sounds like they need something to fill their days with AND they don't know how to do their own jobs. If you know the work well enough, you can understand milestone/status checkins and gauge progress enough to fill your useless reports.

If the work gets done, what's the problem?

This is how you realize that management spent a good chunk of their day just checking on employees while not actually doing anything, and now they're being exposed for having to find ways to fill their day while employees are still being as productive as they were previously.