Technically I don't know that it's offensive to taste.
And my dog likes it.
But I'm still not going to check.
This is one of the reasons I don't like dogs who lick people. I'm fine with your dog until he starts trying to lick me.
I also don't like when your laying down, and the cat walks on your chest, just to block your view of the tv, and sticks it's butthole in your face. You're all like "eeewwww, no cat butt!!!" But the cat is like "meow!". You have to tell them "Look, we've been over this. I don't speak meow. You need to learn more words. Like if I pull a can of f-o-o-d out, you go nuts. And I have to spell that word, because I'm not trying to excite you, and then disappoint you. Because I'm NOT an asshole, and am being empathetic to YOUR feelings. Unlike you."
And she says "Meow".
And I say "I still don't get the nuances of meow language. It can't be one word that means everything. This isn't Hawaii."
And she says "Meow."
It's a losing battle trying to teach cats to speak english when they lack vocal cords. But maybe it's a good thing they can't speak. They could be like carrots. Always screaming how much pain they're in, and how they have a baby carrot at home. All just because I'm trying to make a salad.
Now.......cucumbers? They scare me. They're practically giddy to be chopped up. Real masochists.
But at least they're not smug, like George Clooney. The smug bastard!
Are you high? Lmao. What a comment 🤣
If you want some more laughs dig through their comment history. This is par for the course
teach cats to speak
I have relevant scientific data, https://youtu.be/UbJtehCZnuE
Cats aren't necessarily intending on sticking their butt in your face. They see you as vulnerable when you're laying down, and since they respect you, they're going to guard you by facing the other way to protect you from the open area.
Totally get the dogs licking you though.
Gold.
Thank you, I've been trying to figure out how to give Lemmy Gold. Didn't realize it was this easy
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I've heard people with dogs are healthier because they get bacteria from their dogs.
You've never dropped an impressively large deuce before, looked at it and gone "wow, all that was inside me?"
"If my ass can open wide enough for that, surely a dick wouldn't hurt..." - Every dude at some point.
Ive thought that about your dad.
Gramma?
I can play that part, yes.
Sound? I associate the sound with ppl; once it's out, it's pretty quiet.
I think association counts if the sounds associated with it are consistently repulsive. For example, the sound of flies swarming around a pile of crap.
Which reminds me:
Two flies sitting on piece of poo. One of them farts, says the other,
'Do you mind! I'm eating!'
If you take away the sight and smell, it probably feels alright.
Guarantee it would be a widely used substance if it wasn't for the smell... People would be making scriptures out of it and fixing up cracks in their homes. It would be considered innocent and fun, and some would alter their diets to get a particular consistency.
Incredibly gross to us, and probably still unhygienic. Maybe that's why it smells, to keep us away from it!
fixing up cracks in their homes
They used to although they generally used animal dung.
People will make scriptures out of any old shit, as long as it agrees with what they already believe.
If you take away sight and smell, you could probably get some cool synth/bass/rhythm type sounds out of it, too, if you sampled it.
Sounds like an unpleasant shower... I'm sorry
So is vomit, and I'd say that it's worse because shitting feels good while vomiting doesn't and hearing someone having a shit isn't as bad as hearing someone vomit.
Vomiting feels way better than needing to and not being able to though
Jokes on you, I’m into that shit.
What?
It feels great! At least, when coming of me. You don't like shitting? 🤷🏻♂️
I love shitting. I just had a really big coffee and am preparing for first shit of my work shift.
Humans have about 21 senses.
Pain and touch are 2 different ones, balance is an other, hunger, suffocation, gag reflex, temperature, ... it goes on and on. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sense
My favorite sense to describe is proprioception, being able to tell the position your body is in.
That’s the only one I ever remember except for temperature
Offensive to most people. MOST PEOPLE!
a while ago I was trying to find a funny story I read about someone taking a dump in a home depot display toilet, so I could read it to my friend. but I guess my search was too ambiguous and it lead me right to the "coprophilia" subreddit, directly to a post that included the most rancid story I've ever read. I won't repeat the details, but my friend and I decided to end our search there because we had enough "shit talk"
hopefully not at the same time
Horse shit is alright
"Well, it smells disgusting, feels mushy and gross, looks nasty, and I'm traumatized for life after hearing the portapotties at the burrito festival. OK, just one more sense to test....
The funniest fucking thing happened to me today. I was taking a good shit, and I was like fuck, I better check on it. I look to see how things are coming out, and a giant shit falls out. As soon as it hit the water it disappeared. The offensive part is that I still don't have any answers for the Spookie Dookie
A "Showerthought" is a simple term used to describe the thoughts that pop into your head while you're doing everyday things like taking a shower, driving, or just daydreaming. A showerthought should offer a unique perspective on an ordinary part of life.
