DeVito on DeBurrito

All existence is awful, but if you were a vampire you would get to wear a neat cape

What about "Whacky Extracty"

I believe they're called LipSlitters

I rarely answer calls from known numbers

Unfortunately I don't believe she does, the closest thing I could find was “Principles are like prayers. Noble of course. But awkward at a party.”

I prefer "pets of the flesh"

Become the poop