Suffice it to say it seems like you already agree with the de facto LML stance: west is evil.

Yep, that's correct. (btw I definitely do not associate myself with communists, it's just that we agree on this particular point)

This position seems to divorce Ukrainians of any agency in determining their future.

It doesn't! Those who want to fight, should definitely fight, and I don't argue against west supporting those who want to fight with weapons, training, and whatever else. It's actually the west that is not giving Ukrainians any choice in determining their future (see text below).

Are they not entitled to defending the sovereignty of their nation?

Again, they absolutely are! I totally support right for self-defense.

Who are you (or I) to tell them under what circumstances they should be allowed to push back against an invading force such as Russia?

Absolutely correct again and I totally agree with you, nobody should be able to prevent people from "pushing back against an invading force".

They are a sovereign nation that agreed to the Budapest memorandum and regardless who supplies them with weapons they can determine for themselves their destiny. It isn’t for us to adjudicate from some kind of moral high ground which parts of Ukraine should be sliced off to the highest bidder even if the bullets they fire are made in capitalist imperialist evil America.

Again, totally agreed.

The thing that I'm trying to say, and the thing that I'm getting called a fascist for, is that it is not "west is supporting brave Ukrainians who want to defend their nation and fight Russia to regain the occupied territories at all cost" it is "west is supporting Zelensky's regime (which I also consider absolutely illegitimate and authoritarian, their terms have expired, they ban all the opposition, they refuse elections, etc.) which forces people to fight by forbidding people to leave the country (which has already lead to many deaths of people who tried to escape this hell by crossing rivers/mountains and not making it), and kidnapping people on the streets, putting them into vans and sending them to the frontlines to die, and making the rest fear of going out" (you can find footages and sources for all of that if you visit my profile's comments, but lemme know if you want me to repost it again here).

Aaaaand yeah, that's exactly what I was talking about ^ :/

And you know the funniest shit about that?

wikipedia:

Fascism is a far-right, authoritarian, ultranationalist political ideology and movement, characterized by a dictatorial leader, centralized autocracy, militarism, forcible suppression of opposition, belief in a natural social hierarchy, subordination of individual interests for the perceived good of the nation or race, and strong regimentation of society and the economy

That's exactly, like exactly what I argue against, and those who call me fascist argue in favor. I'm getting labeled fascist by actual fascists XD

There’s a legal obligation to provide defense lawyers to defendants and it obviously isnt done by holding lawyers at gunpoint.

Yes, it's covered by the first point of my post.

Force people to pay tax under threat of violence or find some other way to steal money.

Ukrainians in Crimea and other annexed territories [that are not close to the front lines] have more or less normal life now. They can continue living where they live, or they can at any moment return to Ukraine, nobody is holding them hostage, they are free!
On the other hand, Ukrainians who failed to escape Ukraine don't really have a choice other live in fear that today might be the day they (or their family) get kidnapped and sent to the army, or try to escape and get caught by "heroes" of the border patrol who carefully watch that nobody escape the meat grinder (unless they give them a hefty bribe).

Ukraine wants to fight for their nation

People want to live. Politicians want to play geopolitcs.

You think that if they wanted to surrender, they wouldn’t have done so by now?

Who are they? Nobody gives a choice to Ukrainians, and those who dare to say something against the government are sent to die.

Stop pretending that trump is giving them a choice rather than taking away their choice to defend their nation

Whose choice to defend their nation? The politicians? People are being kidnapped from the streets, and against their will sent to the army. Do you call this a choice?

if a fire were burning up your next door neighbor’s house, would you deny that helping them to put out that fire helps keep your house safe too?

Exactly, I would be helping them to put out the fire (end the conflict), instead of pouring gasoline on it (supporting the government that refuses to negotiate, and murders hundreds of thousands of people).

Withholding aid is what is getting Ukrainians killed

No, supporting and encouraging a government which refuses to negotiate and sends people to their deaths is what getting them killed.

Shooting the hostage does technically end the negotiation, and that’s the equivalent to what he is suggesting

The only hostage in this situation is Ukrainian population, that is slowly getting butchered. So in your analogy, he is the only one negotiating the release of hostages, while everybody else is busy killing them.

cede territory

Lots if not most of people would prefer to be alive on ceded territory than dead on whatever territory. You are suggesting to kill millions of innocent people without giving them a meaningful choice.

selfish asshole

Do you think millions of people who will get to live due to his actions are going to call him selfish? I wouldn't. If what you mean instead is that his actions wouldn't benefit USA in its geopolitical game with Russia by the cost of lives of other people - you can just say that.

There was a highly upvoted post here on lemmy with "saving lives is hot" as the title, what happened to that? Or does it work only when it is about Americans, and Ukrainians can be massacred?