The man writing is in a bear suit. He translated the roar as 'zipper', which indicates the bears have figured out his secret. He is then presumably eaten.

I think her time as a criminal prosecutor will come in handy.

Gay marriage became legal for all states during Obama's administration, I'd call that progress.

I make $200k and only donated $100, so I'm technically worse.

I remember seeing it in theaters on opening day (I was 9). I've loved it ever since.

But then they'd have to stop eating shrimp, so...

Harvard isn't a government funded organization, so the first amendment doesn't apply. Hopefully the students find a way to sue based on the college's own rules though.

Wii would like to bang.

Not with that attitude

"I'm so stinking mad" Trump (probably)

Is it... not supposed to?

Speaking ass an app developer, the person who chose the text is probably not the person who did the development or testing. This is probably a default template where they just say "what's the title, what's the message". It would be very unlikely that it was anything butt a coincidence.