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The only thing that really matters is if you are driving or not. So if the vehicle is turned off and the keys are out of the ignition, you are not a driver. Therefore they cannot issue any moving violations or any similar driving related citations. Unless you are illegally parked, that's another issue.
If they are already approaching you, and you jump out of the car, that would look automatically suspicious to the suspicion-filled pig brain. So if you want to get out just do that before they approach.
Nah, if you are in control of the vehicle. Meaning if you have the keys and the ability to turn it on and drive. Sleeping drunk in a vehicle can get you a DUI even if the car is off and you're parked.
Seems to me you can be charged with DUI if you're drunk and in a car regardless of whether the keys are in it or not?
I don't think so
It depends on the location and local laws, but even then cops can charge you with whatever they want. Whether those charges hold up in court is another story.
Correct. This is no different than if my friend gives me a ride and runs into a store to buy something while I stay in the car. It's not a traffic stop so police can't just demand that I give them papers and prove the car is legally allowed to be on the road because we're not on the road.