53
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] TokenEffort@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 week ago

Almost every friend group I was in had at least one friend bully me in private. One would only be hurtful online and on the phone and would "end the friendship" over nothing. But if he's sorry then I'm forced to forgive him. No one believes he said he was never speaking to me again because they never saw it, it was on the phone.

Another was a stalker who deliberately copied everything I did and tried to rape me whenever she was alone with me in the bathroom, but I was the problem because I was the only person who had an issue with her. She was so pleasant and happy with everyone else but with me she was always angry and would do things she assumed I did, like watch anime and brag about how much anime she watched when I never watched anime and was a nintendo fan, something you'd know if you actually spoke to me. She also wore the same shirt and jeans every day without washing them as they were the closest thing she had to my clothes, and I didn't wear anything Cool, just a plain blue shirt and navy blue jeans.

Then another tried raping me every day for months, would give up and dry hump or grope instead. I only made my clothes hard to undo since no one saw it so I must be lying. I eventually reported it, he got suspended, and everyone in the group ignored me ever since.

And on top of that I was alienated and bullied by family for existing.

If everywhere smells like shit check under your shoe. If you don't have friends then the common denominator is you. If everyone's an asshole then you're the asshole, etc. Obviously if I go through this a lot I'm the problem.

[-] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

My “picker” was broken for many years, so I have a bunch of crazy exes. The common denominator among them was me, but that doesn’t mean I was a bad person, just that I didn’t know what to look for when dating (plus I’m autistic and a bad judge of character). I did eventually have to work on that before I could start dating and trusting people again.

Just because you’re the common denominator doesn’t mean that you’re an asshole. Predators often seek out traumatized people, but you’ll have to work on making yourself a bad target for them if you want to avoid them. I’m sorry, it’s not fair.

this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2024
53 points (93.4% liked)

Ask Lemmy

27254 readers
1480 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !askusa@discuss.online


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS