It sucked, but it was the right call. As soon as I got sober, I realized that we didn't belong together. To put it plainly, I didn't enjoy spending time with her. Something the alcohol masked tremendously. Luckily I had some support from friends, but even that came with caveats. I went from being respected, to being seen as a creepy outsider within my friend group, which was very weird. I hosted two great parties whilst married, and once single, I decided to throw a Halloween costume party rager, and nobody showed up. It's like taking a very large cut to your social standing.

I also had some random people come out the woodwork trying to jump my bones, and it was such a turn-off, gave me the ick. I honestly should have just moved to a new city after the divorce, it would have made things easier.

I made the same mistake a lot of freshly de-coupled people make, trying to date WAY too early. Like, 6 months after the end of a decade long relationship, is not the time to start a new long-term relationship. As time goes on, now I'm 3 years post-divorce, and due to some more personal turmoil, I'm only now opening myself up to the possibility of trying to date again. It sucks that doing the right thing is usually also the hard thing, and takes time to get over.