276
Choose A or B
(lemmy.world)
B, and it isn’t even close.
What about B appeals to you
Also balding
It’s more that infinite uncles implies an incredibly high rate of being molested. If it’s literally infinite, it’s being molested a lot.
Uncles or fish is irrelevant, infinite anything with mass presumably fills the entire space of the universe immediately and collapses everything into a giant singularity.
Only within a finite space. If the universe is infinite then they can be spaced arbitrarily far apart
If the space was infinite, we wouldn't exist.
From the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy:
It is known that there are an infinite number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there must be a finite number of inhabited worlds. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination.
load more comments
(2 replies)
Wouldn't the non molester uncles protect you from the molester uncles thereby creating war on earth between the uncles that want to molest you and the ones that want to protect you.
I would also like to prevent a war where one possible outcome is a whole army molesting me.
load more comments
(1 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
Infinite uncles means the population of earth is completely unsustainable and the collapse of every system is imminent.
load more comments
(2 replies)
Fuck taxes
For me, literally everything except the balding and I really couldn't give a shit, I'll buzz it all off anyway.
Infinite rare fish? Well as it happens, fishing is my biggest hobby, so that's just fuckin delightful.
Mongolian real estate empire? Well that's passive income and/or something I can sell. As a mongol mogul, in gonna try working the angle of an exotic but affordable fishing, hunting, and nature tourism destination, really try to put Mongolia on the map for Western tourists.
No taxes dovetails nicely here, also making it easier to both expand as well as make the business model more resilient.
Neighbors scared of me? Great! If they seem cool, I'll reach out to them, otherwise, fear is a great way to not have to deal with shitty neighbors! In Mongolia they'll be far away anyway.
Night light to keep the monsters at bay.
And the balding we will deal with by just keeping it buzzed low or shaving my head completely.
load more comments
(2 replies)
B all the way. I'll use my real estate and no taxes to figure out a way to make a fuck ton of $400/month apartments like it's 1990 to help the less fortunate/average person. I'll then use the no taxes to hopefully refine my business model to the point of making my affordable apartment business more widespread across the entire country and just keep expanding until I get either assassinated or receive a Nobel Prize.
Depends on how scared the neighbors are. Are they "let's avoid that guy" scared, or "we better kill him before he kills us" scared ?
load more comments
(1 replies)
rip in pices
load more comments
(1 replies)
B is preferable mainly because the prospect of always being hard seems horrible.
Having to contact my doctor every 3 hours sounds exhausting.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Ok and hear me out here... Tell me more about the Uncles.
Because if they are gainfully employed in a variety of fields I now have amazing contacts for anything on the cheap.
If they are the "handsy" uncles, they are significantly less desireable.
You have an infinite number of uncles. Statistically, many of them are going to be billionaires, handsy creeps or creeps out to collect your hands.
load more comments
(3 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
Infinite rare fish sounds awesome, but I'm a bit concerned about logistics
Infinite things, by definition, can not be rare.
Unless you control their availability.
load more comments
(1 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
B. Obviously. Not even a question
Infinite rare fish
They’d no longer be considered “rare” then, right? Or can only I eat/keep them?
Night light
Could be good or bad. Is this a night light in just one specific room? Is it a flashlight I always have on me to use as needed? Is it a glowing orb that floats around me that I can’t control?
Every rare fish is the only one of its kind
load more comments
(1 replies)
of those 12 attributes, only two of them are desirable.
I'm just gonna opt out of this entire post.
Can I unplug the night light?
yeah but theres a second one
load more comments
(3 replies)
B. Sell all the fish, House the homeless, not have to pay taxes on anything including selling of fish and housing the homeless, walk past my neighbors every night at 10:01 PM with a cart of rare fish, pay for more hair with rare fish.
I thought this was about Animal Crossing because of the fish but regardless B
Do all the fish exist right away or I can just like summon them from the void whenever I want?
load more comments
(1 replies)
B. Use fish to fund low income/homeless/transitional shelters. Also, balding. That's more hair than I have now!
What kind of "guess the billionaire" game is this?
Is Mongolian real estate empire a tent shop?
I think people are overestimating the ease of selling and market demand for rare fish. Most are likely not edible or desirable to be eaten.
Oh they're dead fish? I was hoping to restore threatened and endangered species.
load more comments
(2 replies)
Seriously specific
Probably A. Gotta get that balding
Both are balding. You are just covering up the fact that you want an infinite amount of uncles
No, just the balding. (How did you know?)
B. Not even a question. A is awful (except being friends with Tom could be chill)
Being friends with Tom Hardy seems like the worst bit. Who the hell wants to be friends with some preppy english toff?
load more comments
(1 replies)
A, I'd create an uncle army and take over the world.
I'm more peaceful, I would just make an uncle reactor.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Infinite rare fish sounds like a modded skyblock resource generation system
On the one hand, no taxes. On the other,
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2023
276 points (92.3% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
27206 readers
3693 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS