3 randomly rolled unique quality items off a table of 1000. All 1000 of them have flavor text that eludes to them having hidden stats, but actually 500 of them have no stats at all and the 500 others modify stats irrelevant to the game with things like "30% more percentages" and +0.0001% more ‽"

Trick question, I will never be defeated.

i dunno, but whatever it is will forever curse the scavenger in ways that linger long after the loot is discarded or destroyed.

Sweet potatoes. 🍠

Dank Nugs!

• 45% chance: Random 3D printed cosmetic item
• 45% chance: Uncommon keyboard loot box
• 10% chance: Legendary keyboard loot box

a phone, a wallet, and a bundle of keys

also, maybe some bullshit manifesto

I'm that NPC that sits some in the corner and doesn't drop anything, who the devs placed there to make you feel bad for doing a genocide run

3d4*100 polyhedral dice, most of which are d6s and d10s. Each die will have a 50% chance of being glow-in-the-dark, and a 1% chance of being unusually shaped.

phone, used clothes, maybe a pocket knife. Rare loot would be a steamdeck or other portable game machine.

A god-tier travel mug, a rare leather armour (+1 vs cat claws) and a pair of comfortable walking shoes.

Weed pen, Some cute socks, 10 bucks, Scrunchie.

Right now:

iPhone 12 Mini 128GB iPhone 15 128GB

Keys to work, apartment, attic storage and laundry room.

Wallet with debit card, public transport card, driving license, public pool membership card (expired several years ago), European health insurance card, eyeglass perscription.

anxiety-inducing notebook (incomprehensible)

A pile of shit... literally. I have IBS, so there is always more shit just waiting for the wrong time. Aside from that... extra clothes, see above. Lol

A trove of memes that distracts my killer from future quests

Well, obviously the usual drops for humans, but since I'm a unique, named encounter, I also have a chance to drop:

• A three-prong soil moisture sensor
• 1d3 polyhedral dice, random
• A plastic card with a random certifications and qualification (roll 1d20 on the qualification table, six time. Duplicates mean last year's card wasn't thrown out)
• Air sample filter disks (used or clean)

I would explode like a creeper.

A cane, bent glasses, and a SSD filled with movies.

My gimmick is that it depends. On five days out of the week, some Basic meds, electronics, an Uncommon wireless headset, a Rare hat, but most importantly, a Legendary key card to a bank operations center. On one of those days in particular, it gets even better. Not only do I have the key card, but I also drop an Exotic Red Dragon walking stick, +1 Leather Bracers, 1-3 random Rare or better magic pendants, and an Exotic His and Hers Dungeon Divers Duffle containing 5 random sets of Uncommon or better polyhedral dice, 3 Books of Gaming, and 2 Player's Notebooks.

Writing this post has made me feel rich and well equipped, even though I'm barely over minimum wage. Thank you, I guess, for helping appreciate what I have that much more.

If I'm defeated at night: Three bottles of bourbon, a guitar, two tacos, and a beaten up cowboy hat.

If I'm defeated during the day: Bad code, a cup of coffee, and a gallon jug of water.

im going to assume in my prime and that would be mountain dew.

A ukulele, box of wine, old junky necklace, and two quarters and credit card with a Very Difficult hacking rating.

The secret master key

Flow chart plans!

"Kinky 'Fro"

A curse

I have a collection of vintage phones. Like, rotary phones from the 60s and earlier. I'd probably drop them. It would be very loud.

Loose change

Random cruft… what else could I drop!! 🙂

A cloud of depression.

Don't loot it, it aint worth it.

Common