so how do you survive them? and on a daily basis?
Live your life according to your own schedule and speak your actual truth.
Last time I tried this approach they made me feel like shit and bullied me.
actually I don't agree.
To me this is deflection: they ask me something I don't want to answer, I lie to them and try to stay away from them: I don't disclose anything about me, they don't feel offended, don't start drama and leave me alone.
Gossips are gonna gossip no matter what I say, they need it, so I'd better disclose false information so they can attack me the least.
My strategy if they ask me again about my age if they suspect I lied to them or if they hear from other gossips my real age: lie again or say a ludicrous number. If they keep pestering me, remind them to go to work and go to work.
Sometimes I think I should work somewhere else.
I’ve never really had a problem.
then my coworkers are all busybodies who don't know what boundaries are.
Still, answering 'how old are you' with 'none of your business' seems overkill. I just want them to leave me alone.
everything's good, I didn't understand your /s
yeah, 40 and unmarried. I’m so lonely. I scream and cry myself to sleep every night. I drink 5 gallons of vodka just to make it thru a shift.
I imagine myself using your answers with my coworkers, who are gossips and they replying how rude I am, feeling outraged and refusing to help me with my job.
The thing is, I'd use this answer with people that separate their private life from their jobs, but where I am, and in nursing in general, this doesn't happen. And if they don't separate both things, then they stop helping all together when they perceive you as unfriendly, meaning I have to work more.
I guess the price I pay for their help is faking interest in their lives.
I need to work somewhere else, don't I?
do you understand that this is an emotional response and it's kinda off to ask a person not to have trauma? do you think people like being bullied?
and that guarantees that they furiously gossip about it when I'm not around.
I respected his decision.
these coworkers do not. I wouldn't need to lie if all coworkers were this respectful.
thank you for your detailed answer.
my reasons have to be acceptable to them, because otherwise, they'll feel offended. And this is not a group of adults capable of separating work from personal life, they perceive slights very easily and once they feel offended, they lash out and use any pretext to not help with patients and suddenly, I'm the only one catering to patients while they sit and talk.
I just want to work until I find another workplace. I don't believe it makes sense to work with them long term.
I cannot eat lunch alone because I have to be on call, even when I'm doing my pause. As a matter of fact, I don't have a pause. At other units, employees take turns to pause and the ones on duty, work, so each of us gets 30 minutes of peace. This doesn't happen where I work because for whatever reason, manager wants us to eat all together and feels offended if somebody chooses not to eat with them. They feel offended even for this. If I choose eating elsewhere, manager will order me with her fake politeness to eat with them, because I have to be there, should a patient need me.
What about this: I'm there, eating with them. They ask me a privy question and I answer: 'nice weather today' or 'what did you have for breakfast'? completely ignoring the question and trying to redirect.