I'm sorry to put a dampener on everyones friday night, but I'm not coping right now. I feel like my life isn't getting better I feel like the last few years I've been in this near constant state of fight or flight. I just wish my life would finally settle down. the last few years every time I think it has, something happens to cause chaos again. I'm just exhausted and stressed out and I don't want to be here any more.

This ongoing situation at work has me horrifically anxious. I am so done with toxic workplaces and just wish i could find a chill job to settle down in and probably return to study. My last job ended up being very toxic and now this one. I'm feeling pretty hopeless and terrified my next job is also going to be toxic. Man I wish i had a time machine so I could just relive the years 2011 - 2017 over and over again. Those were happy years with a great job.

I've taken today as well as part of yesterday off, but having spent most of today out of the house, I've totally lost my momentum and left a shit tonne of chores till tonight - as well as a plethora of packing after a month of sprawling out around here - I gotta be out by 9am tomorrow for an appointment.

It's feeling overwhelming but I'm using the washing machine and dishwasher running time to give myself a breather or time other tasks.

Driving on the Western was yet another shitshow today (even counter peak). Honestly there's a special brand of insanity out there. I think what took the cake today was seeing a white SUV with a custom plate doing at least 130km/h (actual), undertaking both lanes on the left by using the MERGE LANE that was just ending from an on ramp

Tonight's party platter

Image of a square plate of smoked cheese, cocktail onions and Spanish black olives, philly cheese and sweet chilli sauce, bread roll and simit, spanish smoked mussels, dry biscuits and a shadow.

Friday night in the CBD is a colourful scene.

yum, I just made a dessert of fresh mixed berry sauce to go with fruit, yoghurt or icecream. I had it with 2 big spoons of no fat no sugar yoghurt.

Here is the recipe. 500 g frozen mixed berries. 2 tbsps sugar, juice of one orange. Half defrost the berries then blend it all together. Eat. Keep remainder in fridge.