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The Batcave is suspiciously guano-free. Alfred has some really thankless jobs. (lemmy.world)
submitted 6 days ago by FlyingSquid@lemmy.world to c/showerthoughts@lemmy.world
21 comments fedilink hide all child comments

"Alfred, there's bat shit on the batputer again."

"Coming, Master Bruce. I just need to fetch the wet wipes again."

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[-] DahGangalang@infosec.pub 54 points 6 days ago

Perhaps harvesting the guano is where the Wayne family wealth truly comes from.

[-] Deebster@programming.dev 28 points 6 days ago

Wayne Industries Organic Fertilizer

[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 26 points 6 days ago

GWNO .... (pronounced Guano)

Greater
Wayne
Nitrogen
Organics

[-] rockerface@lemm.ee 3 points 6 days ago

They need to expand into other countries so that they can rename to Greater International Wayne Nitrogen Organics

[-] teft@lemmy.world 27 points 6 days ago

In front of my house is a mango tree. My house is white. Also there are lots of bats in the neighborhood.

Needless to say, I wish I had an Alfred.

[-] Zahille7@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago

I'm jealous of that mango tree though... Mango is my favorite fruit

[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 16 points 6 days ago

Batman arrives at the crime scene with drippings of wet grey guano running down the left side of his chest

Joker: ..... HAHAHAHA ... what's that Batman ... you're little friends show you a bit of love?

Batman mumbles: ..... hughhg? ... (looks down at his suit) ... ALFRED!!!!!!!

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 12 points 6 days ago

That probably means Batman smells like batshit, and everyone is too afraid to tell him.

[-] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 8 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

No, they're not!

🎶Jingle bells,

Batman smells..🎵

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 3 points 6 days ago

Sure, but has anyone sang that around him?

[-] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 days ago

Not within 6 feet. Not because of the danger, but you can't inhale any closer

[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 3 points 6 days ago

The mask is actually a nasal cannula so that he can avoid the stench of guano on his suit, his cape, his car, his bike, his plane, his mansion.... everything.

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 3 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

I think he's been around it for so long he doesn't even notice it

[-] sir_pronoun@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago

Don't mention the parasites you get from bat poop (was it all a fever dream? The whole batman saga?)

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago

BATMAN CAUSED COVID!

[-] shig@misanthropolis.xyz 3 points 6 days ago

Bat wipes. They have many uses.

[-] Slovene@feddit.nl 0 points 6 days ago

I bet lots of batcum on the keyboard too. And not from the animals.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago

The Robins were all teenagers.

[-] Slovene@feddit.nl 3 points 6 days ago

So Batman was a groomer?! Disgusting!

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago

I mean...

this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2024
183 points (98.4% liked)

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